Well.........DUH!

I had my first "duh" moment this morning... I'm sure my first of many. 

I have been beating myself up periodically about how unqualified I am, the twins will probably be "behind", etc, etc, etc....Yesterday at the zoo I had another episode.  It hit me this morning - hard.  We are not having public school at home.  We are having HOMEschool at home.  Big difference.

Is public school bad?  Absolutely not.  However, many of the teachers (if you can get them to be honest) will tell you that state standards are too high, and children are required to learn skills before they are ready.  I don't have such strict standards.  Will my children learn everything that they would have learned in public school??? YES!! And more!!  Will they necessarily learn it at the same time?? NO!! And that's ok!!!!  At this moment, I'm filling in the gaps from the last 3 years of math.  Their teachers did a wonderful job of teaching them, but there are some hiccups I've found that I have to cure now.  There is no perfect educational system.  Period.  There are pros and cons to each side.  Everyone has an opinion (and most of the time, they will voice that opinion loud and clear!).  My children are happy and excited to learn.  For this, I am blessed, humbled and thankful. 

Thank you for sharing this chaotic life with me ;)  I hope you enjoy the ride!

Lions and Tigers and Bears, oh my!

Today marked our first official homeschool educational outing.  We enrolled in the Knoxville Zoo homeschool Tuesdays class.  Lukas and Shelby LOVED it!  I mean, really .... dry ice, chinchillas, the elephant exhibit and red pandas, all led by a zoo educator.  What's not to love??!!  I want to join the class!!!

I'm excited for them and all they will learn.  These classes will run every Tuesday through November, then pick back up in January and go until spring.  I'm looking forward to some quiet time during their class where I can commune with nature and the animals.  Mommy has some reading to catch up on!  We are there at the best possible time - Tuesdays during lunch.  There aren't many people there and the animals are out and active.  We got some wonderful photos of the komodo dragon and videos of the river otters and black bears.  The bears were CLOSE to the glass... those dudes are HUGE!!!  Shelby "made friends" with a river otter - he loved her purple umbrella and would follow it as she moved it on the glass. 

 We are going to thoroughly tour/investigate a different section of the zoo each week and learn something new.  At least... that's the plan ;)  I'm excited about this new venture, and I'm thrilled that they are excited, too!  It's just another confirmation for me that God's hand is in this and we are doing what He wants. 

Reflections from 3 a.m. ...

• I have developed a new scientific name:  ickeous explosionous.
• The dog has to pee at 3 a.m., no matter what is going on in the dining room, hall and kitchen.
• All paper towels are not created equal.  If you must use cheap ones for every day, go ahead.  Have good ones on hand, hidden in the back of the closet.  You can thank me later.
• The floor cleaner on Pinterest works wonders.  Make some.  Today.
• I have regretted taking all my carpet up at times.  I will no longer have this regret.  At 3 a.m., carpet is evil.
• I think that alarm clock companies should make a sound exactly like a small child expelling dinner.  No one would ever be late to work again.  Grown men would be standing in factories all across America in their underwear with eyes wide open ready to go to work each morning...
• My son can sleep through anything.
• There are things at mamaw's house my daughter shouldn't eat.
• My husband is a better thinker, planner and strategizer at 3 a.m.
• God gave me an acute lack of hearing and a strong intolerance to certain smells.  It is both a blessing and a curse.
• The brain is powerful.  It can recall aforementioned smells and make you think they are still around after they are gone.
• I should be more careful about what I leave stacked in the floor.
• Purchasing a box of disposable rubber gloves is never a bad idea.
• Communicating to your spouse your intent is always a good idea.
• Prayer is necessary, even in the details.
• A backrub and a pink poodle can make anything better.

I remember this happening in years past, and I would think "Dear Lord, please let her feel better for tomorrow" ... and of course, she usually did.  Missing just one day of public school is hard.  There are lots of things that they are told verbally, told once, and they either get it or "too bad".... That's just the way it is.

I have to say, I did well for our first homeschool hiccup.  I wasn't nearly as wonky about her getting back to bed, back to sleep, and well.  Now, she can do most of her work from her bed.  I can modify and change things until she's able to come back to "school".  And... if we are on the couch all day, I can make sure that it's not a wasted day.

This new path God chose won't be easy - I'm not that naive!  But, He handed it to me on a silver platter, and He will give me the strength, guidance and wisdom to make the decisions and carry out the work involved. 

With the cancellation of our first field trip due to the weather, it's time for mom to go find a plan B.  The Wilkerson Academy is going on the road today!

I try to find something to laugh about...

I subscribe to a post on FaceBook called "the busy homeschool mom".... I like her.  She has real world advice.  She's not a blue jean skirt wearing, hair in a bun, bakes her own bread kind of woman.  She's a real homeschool mom!

This was her post today:

I made myself a list of things I wish I had known when I started homeschooling all those years ago...

Education is discipleship. And because of that ...
Curriculum should not ever become the "main" thing.
Character training always comes before curriculum.
...

When we're frustrated and on the verge of burnout, it's time to take a step back and reevaluate what we're doing. His yoke is easy...

Marriage needs to consistently come ... before mothering.

I'm homeschooling, not trying to do "school at home". There really is a difference.

Sometimes, baking cookies is better than math. And it will often accomplish the same thing with better results. :)

Homeschooling through high school is not as scary as "they" say... and totally worth every minute.

Teenagers need their parents more than they let on.

It really will go by as fast as "they" say it will so now is a good time to think about what I want the homeschool years to accomplish. What kind of children do I want to raise?

Sow good things into the lives of the kids now ... reap good things later.

Our kids will not do what we say nearly as often as they will do what we do. Model good things.

Apologize.

Don't be afraid to say "this is not working" and start looking for something that will work.

It's okay to ask for help.

Being real is better than pretending to have it all together.

Never leave Sharpie markers unattended.

Laugh more.

 

 

See, I tricked you, didn't I??!!  You didn't think there would be anything funny in here, until..... you got to the Sharpie markers comment!!!  I'd pay her $5 to tell me the story!!! 

 

I talked to some folks today who were asking about HomeSchool ... they weren't even trying to tell me what a bad idea it was ... the guy said his only concern was the socialization aspect (WOW!! there's one I've NEVER heard before!!) and he had no idea how many groups and co-ops there are just here in this area.  I'm happy that this idea isn't so foreign anymore, and I thank God for the parents who fought for the rights I have today.  Just 40 years ago, I would have been in jail for teaching my children at home...... so sad....

Old dogs CAN learn new tricks!!

That's right ... I'm busted.  I'm an old dog.  I'm old, ok?  I am set in my ways.  I cook a certain way.  I write a certain way.  I fold my towels a certain way.  Chances are good that is not going to change anytime soon!  However.... and this is a BIG however.... there are areas of my life that have changed alot.  Let's take a trip back in time, shall we?

The date is October 4, 2001.  I'll never forget that day.  It was a Wednesday... Bob and I hadn't been married very long and (if you'll look at the date again) the world had just changed forever.  We were attending a local church (it's probably best I omit that name!) and things were not good.  There was a business meeting in which off duty police officers were attending, standing outside the sanctuary door in case things got out of hand.  There was a very bad man pretending to be a pastor presiding and there was more anger and hatred and attitude flying around that building than I have ever had the displeasure of witnessing.  I look back on that night with shame, both for me, my family and others.  We should have left.  We should have walked away.  We were stupid.  Half the church members did leave that night, never to return.  Some never got over it.  And only one entity had any victory that night.  I have images of horns and a pitchfork.

Fast forward ---> The date is now the fall of 2009.  Different church, Same me ... a little calmer, but not much.  Passionate about my call and cause, which can be really, really good or really, really bad!  I had learned my lesson (oh my that so very painful lesson) from before and wasn't so determined to dig my heels in at all cost. It wasn't just Bob and I anymore.... there were children to consider.   Instead of digging in, I was praying to the ceiling.  I didn't really feel like they were going any higher, although I now know they were.  We moved on... at exactly the moment we were supposed to.  God made me stay in that place I hated for months... I came to church in tears, I cried the whole time I was there, and I left in tears.  I didn't want to go and He would NOT let me stay at home.  I was learning ... again, it was SO painful, yet SO necessary. 

During all this, I was doing alot of praying, and not a whole lot of studying.  Oh, I was raised in church.  I know "enough" I suppose... I always had good intentions, but they never lasted long.  I would study my Sunday school lesson and prepare for mission friends on Sunday night, but I never really dug into the Word like I should.

Well, now it's today ... August 8, 2012.  We're planted where God lead and in the manner that He decided... and I'm different for it.  I'm not better.  I'm not perfect (oh that is for to laugh!!).  But... I'm different.  This whole Bible study thing?  Yeah... I'm kind of getting into it now :)  It's done daily, it's done first, and it's the area in our school life that we put the most time into.  And, by the grace of God, my children love it.  They live what they learn, and learn what they live, you see! 

I'm not judging the people of my past.  I've come too far for that nonsense now.  I'm not asking for acceptance or approval.  This is our house, and as for me and my house, we serve the Lord.  Will that make people angry?  I have no doubt.  Do I give a flip?  Would it be callous to say "no"?  I did not have 2 children 9 years ago.  I gave birth to 2 missionaries ... and it's up to me and my husband to train them.  And it is on my head if I don't.  You see, I'm not just 'mom' anymore.  I'm the teacher, too.  It's not my priviledge to be able to teach Christ in every way possible and in every subject - it is my responsibility. 

So yes ... I'm an old dog with a new trick.  I'm searching the scriptures for myself, as I have been instructed to do.  If I need to know it, then I'll find it in there.  If it's not in the Bible, then I could care less about it.  You don't have to agree with me, believe me, or even like me.  That's the good part of this being my blog.  I'm under the assumption that you want to know about me if you are reading my stuff.  I hope that this is an encouragement to someone.  My posts are very rarely planned events.  They come from God's nudge to my heart, and I would be foolish not to obey.

Words of Wisdom

We want our children to learn, but what do we really teach them?  Beyond the basics, what do they learn?  I've had some time to really reflect on this lately, and I've decided to pass along what I intend to pass along to them.

God is the only one you can always trust  -  love people, even when you don't want to  -  you are known by the company you keep  -  this earth is temporary, but Heaven is eternal .... your goal should be to get there  -  satan can't stand it when you speak the name of Jesus and has to flee  -  everyone doesn't like you, even if you want them to  -  papaw always said "if they're talking about you, it's because they find your life more interesting than theirs.  Besides, while they talk about you, they're just giving someone else a rest"  -  read the Bible ... every day  -  forgive, even if they're not sorry  -  stupid people exist ... and they multipy at an alarming rate ... guard yourself  -  negative people will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience  -  no one lives forever ... enjoy each day  -  pray without ceasing  -  eat dinner as a family  -  count it all as joy  -  find a verse of the Bible and a song .... memorize them and repeat them daily  -  bad things may happen, but that doesn't mean you're not loved  -  satan means things for bad ... God will use them for good... ALWAYS  -  being alone doesn't have to mean being lonely  -  never find yourself not in the possession of a good book  -  there is a difference between judging someone's soul and telling them they're wrong  -  mistakes happen ... learn  -  someone will always look prettier, skinnier, smarter, or more popular ... they might be .. but it doesn't mean they're happier  -  jealousy is ugly and contagious  -  a clear conscience is the best sleeping pill ever made  -   you are responsible for your own thoughts, speech and actions ... you don't get to blame others if you act like a dummy  -  pray for your spouse, before you ever meet them  -  emotional eating has hazardous consequences  -  expand your horizons, go to a museum or theaterical production, never stop learning  -  don't argue about the Bible ... it has survived for over 2,000 years without your help  -  be careful little eyes what you see, ears what you hear, mouth what you taste, fingers what you touch, nose what you stick it into  -  there is such a thing as too much sarcasm  -  don't speed... leave on time  -  be punctual  -  don't lie ... you never have to remember anything extra with the truth  -  take pictures of everything important  -  hold the door open for your elders  -  use manners ... yes and no ma'm and sir, please, thank you  -  apologize if you think you need to ... it gets so much easier the more you do it  -  someone who truly loves you will fall in love with your mind first  -  follow your instincts and gut ... that's God  -  if you are uncomfortable somewhere... leave  -  don't wear your heart on your sleeve...put a helmet on and get over it  -  life's too short to be miserable  -  modesty is a necessity  -  dress for the job you want, not the one you have  -  the words you speak (and now, type) are permanent  -  I am firmly convinced the internet, facebook and twitter are of the devil ... use with caution  -  be ready when the Lord returns ... the twinkling of an eye is FAST  -  journal  -  never stop going to church ... no, you can't live to God's potential for you without it, no matter what others say  -  make sure your friends have the same morals and values as you  -  make sure you know what your morals and values are  -  if you are born again, God expects you to act like you are born again  -  get active in your church and community  -  tithe  -  make childhood memories  -  rest your body and mind  -  limit your exposure to TV  -  praying is talking to God  -  physical age has no direct correlation to spiritual and mental maturity ... in other words, people can be real babies  -  pick your battles  -  you never get too old to watch cartoons  -  only eat when you're hungry  -  drink plenty of water  -  silence is golden, duct tape is silver  -  as small as you are in this vast universe, you are big stuff to God  -  your mom prayed for you for 3 years before you were born  -  Sunday afternoons were made to rest  ... do it  ... naps are more awesome the older you get  -  sometimes, you just outgrow people  -  sometimes, God removes someone from your life to protect you ... the worst thing you could do is go chasing after them  -  choose your words carefully  -  be patient ... but for Heaven's sakes, don't pray for it!!!  -  some people are down on their luck and some people pretend they are ... trust God to show you the difference  -  you are made in God's image  -  laugh  -  laugh some more!!  -  never give up, unless God says to  -  pray for your enemies  -  never forget Jesus rose again and God is still on the throne!!

Lead by Example

We spent this morning at the movies, after our Bible study and spelling test.  Homeschool is still a significant amount of work, but what good is it to homeschool if you can't play hookie occasionally, right?  Besides, the upside is we can do the rest of our work this afternoon (which reminds me... Math time!!!).

We had a wonderful time, minus the extremely crude "humor" in the movie and the fact that mommy got choked TWICE on popcorn.  However, I became extremely saddened as I left the theater.  On almost every aisle that someone sat on, there was a mess.  Please understand, the majority of the patrons this morning were moms and small children.  You expect to see a smidgen of popcorn in the floor.  No... it was more than that.  Almost everyone had left their trash in the seats, floor and cupholders.  Mothers who had picked up those colored booster seats left them laying in the seat and floor.  There was popcorn everywhere. 

As I left, I commented on the mess to the two employees standing at the door, perched and waiting to begin the frenzied cleaning process that I knew was in store.  They weren't surprised, and in fact told me that it can get really, really bad sometimes.  I said "no, you don't understand.  These were adults!!".  They understood - I didn't. 

I turned that inward ... what am I teaching my children?  Sure - math and science are necessary for a diploma and college degree.  There are many exciting things that I will teach them in "the hub".  But, what am I teaching them outside that room?  We took our trash to the trash can as we left this morning, and I didn't have to tell them that was necessary.  They're Wilkerson's - that's the drill.  This was not their first rodeo.  When you leave your seat, you toss your junk.  Simple, right??  I know they've learned that lesson well, but where have I failed them?

I hope that I'm giving them a foundation of treating others the way they want to be treated, but I think I need to go even deeper.  I need to teach them to have grace, love and mercy to those who DON'T treat Lukas and Shelby the way they should.  One day, one or both my children might work at that theater.  Will they do their job with a smile, regardless of how the theater looks?  Will they greet everyone with kindness, even if that person left the mess?  Will they "talk" about those messy Bessy's in the break room, or will they rise above such childish behavior??  Yes, they will -- IF -- I teach them to do today -- by my words AND my actions.  Their life will mimic mine.  Is my life worth mimicking?

My prayer today is that my classroom be more than curriculum and books.  I want to do mistakes, and "I'm sorry", and hugs, and forgiveness, and love.